first commit

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Pedro de Oliveira 2017-03-12 00:58:21 +00:00
commit 58d4db2391
18 changed files with 1539 additions and 0 deletions

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#!/usr/bin/perl -w
###################################################################
# leet away script for irssi
# Pedro de Oliveira <bud@serrado.net>
#
# based on randaway.pl written by scn/EFNET, march 2002
# ripped Bruno Almeida <bma@BuBix.net> /ame script
#
# many thanks to buckl3y , lucipher , Domusonline and fatzu @ ptnet
###################################################################
# Just create the files 'awayreasons' and 'backreasons' in your
# .irssi dir with the reasons that you want, and its ready to work
###################################################################
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
use Irssi;
$VERSION = "0.4";
%IRSSI = (
authors => "Florindo Admim",
contact => "bud\@serrado.net",
name => "leet away script for irssi",
description => "Show random public away-messages, and shows how many time you were away",
license => "Public Domain",
changed => 'Sat Sep 28 23:31 WET 2002',
);
# file to read random reasons from. It should contain one
# reason at each line, empty lines and lines starting with # is
# skipped.
$reasonfile = "$ENV{HOME}/.irssi/awayreasons";
$backfile = "$ENV{HOME}/.irssi/backreasons";
my @awayreasons;
my @backreasons;
sub readreasons {
undef @awayreasons;
if (-f $reasonfile) {
Irssi::print("=> Trying to read awayreasons from $reasonfile");
open F, $reasonfile;
# this actually makes the while() work like a while and not
# like a read() .. ie, stopping at each \n.
local $/ = "\n";
while (<F>) {
$reason = $_;
# remove any naughty linefeeds.
chomp($reason);
# skips reason if it's an empty line or line starts with #
if ($reason =~ /^$/ ) { next; }
if ($reason =~ /^#/ ) { next; }
#Irssi::print("\"$reason\"");
# adds to array.
push(@awayreasons, $reason);
}
close F;
Irssi::print("=> Read " . scalar(@awayreasons) . " reasons.");
} else {
# some default away-reasons.
Irssi::print("Unable to find $reasonfile, no reasons loaded.");
push(@awayreasons, "i\'m pretty lame!");
push(@awayreasons, "i think i forgot something!");
};
}
sub readbackreasons {
undef @backreasons;
if (-f $backfile) {
Irssi::print("=> Trying to read backreasons from $backfile");
open F, $backfile;
# this actually makes the while() work like a while and not
# like a read() .. ie, stopping at each \n.
local $/ = "\n";
while (<F>) {
$backreason = $_;
# remove any naughty linefeeds.
chomp($backreason);
# skips reason if it's an empty line or line starts with #
if ($backreason =~ /^$/ ) { next; }
if ($backreason =~ /^#/ ) { next; }
#Irssi::print("\"$backreason\"");
# adds to array.
push(@backreasons, $backreason);
}
close F;
Irssi::print("=> Read " . scalar(@backreasons) . " backreasons.");
} else {
# some default away-reasons.
Irssi::print("Unable to find $backfile, no reasons loaded.");
push(@backreasons, "hey. i am happy to be back. really.");
push(@backreasons, "did i miss anything?");
};
}
sub away {
# only do our magic if we're not away already.
my ($reason, $server) = @_;
if (!$server || !$server->{connected}) {
Irssi::print("Not connected to server!");
Irssi::signal_stop();
return;
}
if ($server->{usermode_away} == 0) {
if (!$reason) {
$reason = $awayreasons[rand @awayreasons];
$server->command("/AWAY $reason");
Irssi::signal_stop();
return;
}
$inicio = time();
Irssi::print("awayreason used: $reason");
$server->command("/ame is gone, $reason");
} else {
Irssi::print("you're already away");
Irssi::signal_stop();
}
}
sub back {
my ($reason, $server) = @_;
$backr = $backreasons[rand @backreasons];
if (Irssi::active_server()->{usermode_away} != 0) {
$back=time();
$total = $back - $inicio;
$dias = int($total/(3600*24));
$total = $total - $dias * (3600*24);
$horas = int($total/(3600));
$total = $total - $horas * 3600;
$minutos = int($total/(60));
$total = $total - $minutos * 60;
$segundos = int($total/(60));
$total = $total - $segundos * 60;
Irssi::print("Back from: " . Irssi::active_server()->{away_reason});
if ($dias ge 1) {
$server->command("/ame is back, $backr - away for \002\037[\002\037 " . uc(sprintf("%x", $dias)) . "\002d\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $horas)) . "\002h\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $minutos)) . "\002m\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $total)) . "\002s\002 \002\037]\037\002");
} else { if ($horas ge 1) {
$server->command("/ame is back, $backr - away for \002\037[\002\037 " . uc(sprintf("%x", $horas)) . "\002h\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $minutos)) . "\002m\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $total)) . "\002s\002 \002\037]\002\037");
} else {
if ($minutos ge 1) {
$server->command("/ame is back, $backr - away for \002\037[\002\037 " . uc(sprintf("%x", $minutos)) . "\002m\002," . uc(sprintf("%x", $total)) . "\002s\002 \002\037]\002\037");
} else {
if ($total ge 1) {
$server->command("/ame is back, $backr - away for \002\037[\002\037 " . uc(sprintf("%x", $total)) . "\002s\002 \002\037]\002\037");
}
}
}}
$server->command("/quote AWAY");
}
else {
Irssi::print("You are not away!");
}
}
sub cmd_ame {
my ($text, $server, $channel) = @_;
if (!$server || !$server->{connected}) {
Irssi::print("Not connected to server!");
return;
}
if ($text) {
foreach $channel (Irssi::active_server()->channels()) {
$server->command("/ACTION $channel->{name} $text");
}
}
else {
Irssi::print("Please Input Some Text!");
}
}
# -- main program --
readreasons();
readbackreasons();
Irssi::print("commands :\n/away -> go away \n/back -> come back");
Irssi::print("/awayreread -> refresh away reasons from awayreasons");
Irssi::print("/backreread -> refresh back reasons from backreasons");
Irssi::print("/ame action in all channels");
Irssi::print("random away script by falso <bud\@serrado.net> loaded!");
Irssi::command_bind('away', 'away');
Irssi::command_bind('awayreread', 'readreasons');
Irssi::command_bind('backreread', 'readbackreasons');
Irssi::command_bind('back', 'back');
Irssi::command_bind('ame', 'cmd_ame');
# -- end of script --

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub floodit {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$file = $data; # Name the file
open( INFO, $file ); # Open the file
@lines = <INFO>; # Read it into an array
close(INFO); # Close the file
foreach $linha (@lines) {
chomp($linha);
chomp($linha);
$witem->command( "/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " $linha" );
}
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'flood', 'floodit' );
Irssi::print("ascii flooding script\nuse with /flood file");

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####################################################
# hypnotoad script foALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD
####################################################
use strict;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
use MIME::Base64;
$VERSION = "1.1";
%IRSSI = (
authors => "Pedro de Oliveira",
contact => "falso\@rdk.homeip.net",
name => "hypnotoad",
description => "With this script you caALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD",
license => "BSD"
);
my $allglory = decode_base64(
"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"
);
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub hypnotoadize {
my $s = @_[0];
my $out;
if ( length($s) > 10 ) {
return
substr( $s, 0, ( length($s) - 6 ) ) . "ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD";
}
return $s;
}
sub send {
my ( $s, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command( "msg " . $witem->{name} . " " . hypnotoadize($s) );
}
sub randomizer {
my ($string) = $_[0];
my $rand = int( rand( Irssi::settings_get_int('hypnotoad_random') ) );
if ( $rand eq 1 ) {
$_[0] = hypnotoadize($string);
Irssi::signal_continue(@_);
}
}
Irssi::settings_add_int( 'misc', 'hypnotoad_random', 100 );
Irssi::command_bind( 'ht', 'send' );
Irssi::signal_add( "send text", "randomizer" );
Irssi::print($allglory);

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub passagem {
my $c = ("\003");
my @passagens = (
"${c}2\"Deitei e dormi; acordei porque o Senhor me sustentou.\" ${c}6Slm.3:5",
"${c}5\"Oferecei sacrifícios de justiça, e confia no Senhor.\" ${c}6Slm.4:5",
"${c}10\"O Senhor é a minha luz e a minha salvação: a quem temerei?\" ${c}6Slm.27-1",
"${c}3\"Bem aventurada é a nação cujo Deus é o Senhor.\" ${c}6Slm.33:12",
"${c}7\"Apressa-te em meu auxílio, Senhor, minha salvação.\" ${c}6Slm.38:22",
"${c}4\"Aquietai-vos e sabei que Eu sou seu Deus; serei exaltado sobre a terra.\" ${c}6Slm.46:10",
"${c}5\"Invoca-me no dia da angústia; Eu te livrarei...\" ${c}6Slm.50:15",
"${c}15\"A minha alma espera somente em Deus; dEle vem a minha salvação.\" ${c}6Slm.62:1",
"${c}7\"O justo se alegra no Senhor, e nele confia.\" ${c}6Slm.64:10",
"${c}10\"Confundidos sejam todos os que servem imagem e escultura.\" ${c}6Slm.97:7",
"${c}9\"Faz cessar a tormenta, e acalmam-se as ondas ondas.\" ${c}6Slm.107:29",
"${c}10\"O Senhor está comigo, não temerei o que me pode fazer o homem.\" ${c}6Slm.118...",
"${c}14\"Justo és, ó Senhor e retos sãos os teus juízos.\" ${c}6Slm.118:137",
"${c}10\"Abomino e detesto a mentira; porém amo a tua lei.\" ${c}6Slm.119:163",
"${c}11\"O meu socorro vem do Senhor, que fez o céu e a terra.\" ${c}6Slm.121:2",
"${c}2\"Os que semeiam em lágrimas segarão com alegria.\" ${c}6Slm.126:5",
"${c}3\"O pai ama o filho e todas as coisas entregou nas suas mãos.\" ${c}6João 3:35",
"${c}12\"Se o pois o filho vos libertar, verdadeiramente sereis livres.\" ${c}6João 8:36",
"${c}13Disse Jesus \"Eu vim para que tenham vida e tenham em abundância.\" ${c}6João 10:10",
"${c}14\"Não te ei dito que, se creres verás a glória de Deus?\" ${c}6João 11:40",
"${c}2\"Se me amares guardeis os meus mandamentos.\" ${c}6João 14:15",
"${c}3\"Eu sou a videira verdadeira e meu pai é o agricultor.\" ${c}6João 15:1",
"${c}7\"Como o pai me amou, também Eu vos amei a vós; permanecei no meu amor.\" ${c}6João 15:9",
"${c}4\"No mundo tereis aflição, mas tende bom ânimo, eu venci o mundo.\" ${c}6João 16:33 ${c}3(Oh GLÓRIA!!!!)",
"${c}5\"Bem aventurados os mansos, porque herdarão a terra.\" ${c}6Mat.5:5",
"${c}7\"Bem aventurados os limpos de coração, porque verão a Deus.\" ${c}6Mat.5:8",
"${c}2\"E Jesus disse: Eu irei e lhe darei saúde.\" ${c}6Mat.8:7",
"${c}4\"E qualquer que entre vós quizer ser o primeiro, seja o vosso servo.\" ${c}6Mat.20:27",
"${c}9\"Porque muitos serão chamados, mas poucos escolhidos.\" ${c}6Mat.22:14",
"${c}10\"Mas aquele que perseverar até o fim será salvo.\" ${c}6Mat.24:13",
"${c}13\"Mas o SENHOR dos exércitos será exaltado em juízo, e Deus, o Santo, será santificado em justiça.\" ${c}2Isaías 5:1",
"${c}7\"O caminho do justo é todo plano: tu retamente pesas o andar do justo.\" ${c}6Isaías 26:7",
"${c}2\"Quem guiou o espírito do Senhor? e que conselheiro o ensinou?\" ${c}6Isaías 40:13",
"${c}3\"Perto está o que me justifica; quem contenderá comigo?\" ${c}6Isaías 50:8",
"${c}5\"O Senhor Jeová me ajuda, quem há que me condene?\" ${c}6Isaías 50:9",
"${c}10\"Verdadeiramente, Ele tomou sobre si as nossas enfermidades e as nossas dores levou sobre si...\" ${c}2Isaías 53:4",
"${c}10\"Na fome te livrará da morte, e na guerra da violência da espada.\" ${c}6Jó 5:20",
"${c}7\"Ensina-me, e eu me calarei, e dai-me a entender em que errei.\" ${c}6Jó 6:24",
"${c}3\"Maldito aquele que ferir ao seu próximo seus dias em bem...\" ${c}6Jó 36:11",
"${c}4\"Ele tem cuidado de vós.\" ${c}6I Pedro 5:7",
"${c}2\"Portanto, meus amados, fugi da idolatria.\" ${c}6I Cor. 10:14",
"${c}14\"Vigiai, estais firme na fé; portai-vos varonilmente, e fortalecei-vos.\" ${c}6I Cor.16:13",
"${c}5\"E o Senhor te porá por cabeça e não por calda...\" ${c}6Deut.28:13",
"${c}4\"Não dirás falso testemunho contra o teu próximo.\" ${c}6Êxodo 20:16",
"${c}7\"Eu não vim chamar os justos, mas sim, os pecadores ao arrependimento.\" ${c}6Luc.5:32",
"${c}9\"Eu os remirei da violência do inferno e os resgatarei da morte.\" ${c}6Oséias 13:14",
"${c}10\"Vigiai e orai para que não entreis em tentação.\" ${c}6Marcos 14:38",
"${c}11\"Humilhai-vos perante o Senhor, e Ele vos exaltará.\" ${c}6Tiago 4:10",
"${c}12\"O destruidor está já junto de ti, guarda tu a fortaleza.\" ${c}6Naum 2:1",
"${c}14\"E esta é a promessa que Ele nos fez, a vida eterna.\" ${c}6I João 2:25",
"${c}2\"Então me invocareis, e ireis, e orareis a mim, e eu vos ouvirei.\" ${c}6Jer.29:12"
);
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command(
"/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . $passagens[ rand @passagens ] );
}
sub jesus {
my $c = ("\003");
my @passagens = (
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os pobres de espírito, porque deles é o reino dos céus\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os que choram, porque eles serão consolados\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os mansos, porque eles herdarão a terra\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os que têm fome e sede de justiça, porque eles serão fartos\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os misericordiosos, porque els alcançarão misericórdia\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Bem-aventurados os que sofrem perseguição por causa da justiça, porque deles é o reino dos céus\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Eu sou o caminho, a verdade e a vida ninguém vai ao Pai se não por mim\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Deixa por agora, porque assim nos convém cumprir toda a justiça\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Está escrito: Nem só de pão viverá o homem, mas de toda a palavra que sai da boca de Deus\"",
"${c}7,8JESUS disse:${c}12,9\"Vinde após mim e eu vos farei pescadores de homens\""
);
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command(
"/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . $passagens[ rand @passagens ] );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'passagem', 'passagem' );
Irssi::command_bind( 'jesus', 'jesus' );

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####################################################
# pseudo-intelectual script for irssi
####################################################
# changelog
# 0.1 first working version /pi <message goes here>
# 0.2 added pseudo_intelectual option
# 0.3 cleared a lot the script with a nice regex from dr_pro <d.oliveira@prozone.ws>
# 0.4 doesnt put the dot if the last word is a smiley, again with a nice regex from dr_pro
use strict;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
$VERSION = "0.4";
%IRSSI = (
authors => "Pedro de Oliveira",
contact => "falso\@rdk.homeip.net",
name => "Pseudo-Intelectual Script",
description => "With this script you can talk ",
"like a real pseudo-intelectual ",
"with the first letter in uppercase ",
"and with the dot at the end.",
license => "GPL",
url => "http://rdk.homeip.net/irssi/",
);
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub convert {
my ($msg) = @_;
$_ = $msg;
s/([^\?\.\!])\s*$/$1./
unless /\w{3,}:\/\/[^\s]*$|:\-?[\>\<\(\)D\/\\]$|^\s+$/;
s/([\?\.\!]\s\w)|^(\w)/uc($1.$2)/eg;
$1 =~ s/( i )/ I /;
$1 =~ s/( i')/ I'/;
return $_;
}
sub pi {
my ( $string, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command( "msg " . $witem->{name} . " " . convert($string) );
}
sub always_on {
my ($string) = $_[0];
my $opcao = Irssi::settings_get_int('pseudo_intelectual');
if ( $opcao eq "1" ) {
$_[0] = convert($string);
Irssi::signal_continue(@_);
}
}
Irssi::settings_add_int( 'misc', 'pseudo_intelectual', "0" );
Irssi::command_bind( 'pi', 'pi' );
Irssi::signal_add( "send text", "always_on" );
Irssi::print(
"pseudo-intelectual script loaded\nuse with /pi <text>\nor /set pseudo_intelectual 1"
);

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##################################################
# crash mirc script for irssi
##################################################
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub own_all {
my ( $data, $server, $channel, $witem ) = @_;
if ( !$channel || $channel->{type} ne 'CHANNEL' ) {
Irssi::print('No active channel in window');
return;
}
foreach my $nick ( $channel->nicks() ) {
$channel->command( "/quote privmsg "
. $nick->{nick}
. " :\cADCC SEND \"x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x\" 0 0 0\cA"
);
}
}
sub owned {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$data =~ s{\s+$}{};
$nick = $data;
$witem->command(
"/msg $nick \cADCC SEND \"x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x\" 0 0 0\cA"
);
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'owned', 'owned' );
Irssi::command_bind( 'own_all', 'own_all' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub fmodeall {
my ( $data, $server, $channel, $witem ) = @_;
if ( !$channel || $channel->{type} ne 'CHANNEL' ) {
Irssi::print('No active channel in window');
return;
}
$modes = "";
$lulz = "";
foreach my $nick ( $channel->nicks() ) {
$modes .= '+v-v+v-v';
$lulz .=
$nick->{nick} . ' '
. $nick->{nick} . ' '
. $nick->{nick} . ' '
. $nick->{nick} . ' ';
}
$channel->command("/mode $channel->{name} $modes $lulz");
}
sub fmode {
my ( $data, $server, $channel, $witem ) = @_;
$data =~ s{\s+$}{};
$nick = $data;
$modes = "";
$lulz = "";
for ( $i = 0 ; $i <= 15 ; $i++ ) {
$modes .= '+v-v';
$lulz .= $nick . ' ';
}
Irssi::print("/mode $channel->{name} $modes $lulz");
$channel->command("/mode $channel->{name} $modes $lulz");
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'fmode', 'fmode' );
Irssi::command_bind( 'fmodeall', 'fmodeall' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub piropo {
my @troll = (
"Ó flor dá para pôr?",
"Ó musa dás-me tusa.",
"Ó bomboca, mostra a toca?",
"Ó doce, era onde fosse.",
"Ó beleza, deixas-ma tesa.",
"Ó boneca, vai uma queca?",
"És como um helicóptero: gira e boa.",
"Ó fêvera, junta-te aqui à brasa.",
"Ó jóia, anda aqui ao ourives.",
"Ó 'morcona', comia-te o sufixo.",
"Ó filha, aperta aqui que é mais fofo.",
"Ó jeitosa, és mais apertadinha que os rebites de um submarino.",
"Andas na tropa? É que marchavas que era uma maravilha.",
"Se fosses um barco pirata, comia-te o tesouro que tens entre as pernas.",
"Tantas curvas e eu sem travões.",
"Usas cuecas TMN? É que tens um rabinho que é um mimo.",
"A tua mãe só pode ser uma ostra para cuspir uma pérola como tu.",
"Tens um cu que parece uma cebola, é de comer e chorar por mais.",
"Só queria que fosses uma pastilha elástica para te comer o dia todo.",
"Tanta carne boa e eu em jejum.",
"Se o teu cu fosse um banco, fazia uma poupança a taxa fixa.",
"Ó filha, agora já percebo porque é que tenho a talocha nas mãos.",
"Belas pernas, a que horas abrem?",
"A ti não te custava nada e a mim sabia-me tão bem.",
"Até davas uma boa actriz mas és muito melhor atrás.",
"Ainda dizem que as flores não andam.",
"Ó filha, com um cuzinho desses deves cagar bombons.",
"Ó filha, levavas aí com o martelo pneumático que fazíamos o túnel do Marquês num instante.",
"Que bela anilha que tu tens, deixa lá enroscar o meu parafuso.",
"Só custa a cabeça que o resto é pescoço.",
"Que rica sardinha para o meu gatinho.",
"Anda cá a cima afagar-me a cobra zarolha.",
"Ó filha, o teu pai devia ter a régua torta para te fazer com curvas assim.",
"Ó filha, fazia-te um pijaminha de cuspo.",
"Quem me dera que fosses um frango para te meter um pau no cu e fazer-te suar.",
"Só queria que fosses um cavalinho de carrossel, para te montar todo o dia por 50 cêntimos.",
"Ó filha, anda cá a cima que até a barraca abana.",
"Contigo filha, era até ao osso.",
"Metia-te inteira até que ma mordesses.",
"Posso tocar no teu umbigo da parte de dentro?",
"Ai de ti que eu saiba que esse cuzinho anda a passar fome.",
"Ó filha, enchia-te essa cona toda de massa.",
"Só não tenho pêlos na língua porque tu não queres.",
"Ó filha, anda cá a cima que ele não se vai chupar sozinho.",
"Tens uns olhos tão lindos, tão lindos, que te comia essa cona toda.",
"Caiava-te toda de branco por dentro.",
"Contigo era até encontrar petróleo.",
"Ó linda, sobe aqui à palmeira e anda-me lamber os cocos.",
"Ó faneca, anda cá que o pai unta-te.",
"O teu cu parece uma serra eléctrica, não há pau que lhe resista.",
"És tão quente que até se me grelham os tomates.",
"O meu amor por ti é como a diarreia, não o consigo manter cá dentro.",
"Diz-me quem é a tua ginecologista para eu lhe ir chupar o dedo.",
"Com esse cu, estás convidada a cagar na minha casa.",
"Contigo até me tornava mineiro, só para te abrir os buracos todos.",
"Podia ficar um mês a cagar trapos mas comia-te com roupa e tudo.",
"Posso pagar-te uma bebida ou preferes em dinheiro?",
"Ainda dizem que a fruta verde não se come.",
"Ó filha, lambia-te o que tu mais gostas.",
"Ó fofa, agarra aqui na corneta.",
"Agarra-me aqui no tarolo, ó princesa.",
"O teu pai deve ser arquitecto, tens um cu que é uma obra.",
"Ó filha, agarra aqui com a mão.",
"Que rico filho. Anda cá cima que eu faço-te outro mas mais bonito.",
"Ó sol, sopra aqui na minha flauta pingante.",
"Ó boneca, era a estrear.",
"Ia até ao fim do mundo por um dos teus sorrisos, e ainda mais longe pela outra coisa que podes fazer com a boca. ",
"Estou a lutar desesperadamente contra o impulso de fazer de ti a mulher mais feliz do mundo.",
"Sabes onde ficava bem a tua roupa? Toda amarrotada no chão do meu quarto.",
"Só a mim é que não me calha uma destas na rifa.",
"Diz-me lá como te chamas para te pedir ao Menino Jesus.",
"Ó filha, queres ir ao céu? Sobe os andaimes que o resto do caminho é por minha conta.",
"Ó filha, se não acreditas que Deus é feito de carne e osso sobe os andaimes e anda cá tocar-me.",
"Abençoados pais que conceberam esta coisinha linda.",
"Por acaso és católica? É que tens um cu que valha-me Deus.",
"Se eu estivesse no teu lugar, tinha sexo comigo na boa.",
"Ó menina, cuidado que prendeu-se-lhe a parte de baixo da saia no manípulo da betoneira.",
"Essa roupa fica-te muito bem, mas eu ficava-te melhor.",
"Se cair, já sei onde me agarrar.",
"Acreditas em amor à primeira vista ou tenho que passar por aqui outra vez?",
"Anda cá que te vou dar uma sessão de raboterapia.",
"Não sou muito bom em matemática mas, 1+1 = 69?",
"Não te esqueças do meu nome, mais logo vais gritá-lo.",
"Minha senhora, troco a sua filha por um piano, assim, podemos tocar os dois.",
"És um bilhete de primeira classe para o pecado.",
"Queria ser um patinho de borracha para passar o dia na tua banheira.",
"Deves estar tão cansada, passaste a noite às voltas na minha cabeça.",
"Posso não ser bonito como o Brad Pitt, nem ter os músculos do Schwarzenegger, mas a lamber sou uma Lassie.",
"Com uma montra dessas, imagino como é o armazém.",
"Ó filha, contigo era até partir os pés à cama.",
"Ó doce, anda cá a cima fazer uma festinha ao tareco.",
"Não és nada de se deitar fora, já tive pior e a pagar.",
"Podes não ser a rapariga mais gira, mas com a luz apagada também é bom.",
"Ó filha, tens carinha de modelo mas o teu cu é um continente.",
"Com umas bóias dessas o Titanic não tinha ido ao fundo.",
"Com um piso desses deves ser mais rodada que a 2ª Circular.",
"Ai não queres? Eu vi logo, gorda como estás é porque não suas muito.",
"Mau? Mau o quê? Disse algum disparate ou chupas aqui mesmo?",
"És mesmo esguia, pareces uma sereia: metade mulher, metade baleia.",
"Ó filha, com menos cu também se caga.",
"Ó filha, se o teu cu fosse uma torrada, precisava de um remo para o barrar.",
"Também só queria saber o teu nome para quando me masturbar saber em quem estou a pensar.",
"Ó filha, só não sou teu pai por quinhentos paus.",
"Ó filha, com esse atrelado só com carta de pesados"
);
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command( "/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . $troll[ rand @troll ] );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'piropo', 'piropo' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
use Irssi qw(command_bind signal_add);
use strict;
use warnings;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
$VERSION = "0.9";
%IRSSI = (
authors => 'falso',
name => 'polvo',
description => '',
license => 'BSD',
);
sub public_polvo {
my ( $server, $msg, $nick, $address, $target ) = @_;
cmd_polvo( $server, $target, $msg );
}
sub own_polvo {
my ( $server, $msg, $target ) = @_;
cmd_polvo( $server, $target, $msg );
}
sub cmd_polvo {
my ( $server, $target, $input_msg ) = @_;
my $output_msg = "";
#print $input_msg;
if ( $input_msg =~ /^\<? ?!polvo/ ) {
#print $input_msg;
$input_msg =~ s/^\<? ?\!polvo ?//;
if ( length($input_msg) == 0 ) {
$output_msg =
"Paul o Polvo espalha a tinta preta e afasta-se rapidamente de cena ...";
}
else {
my @args = split( " ", $input_msg );
if ( scalar(@args) == 1 ) {
$output_msg = sprintf(
"Paul o Polvo Encarna o Cap Obvious e aponta para %s",
$args[0] );
}
else {
$output_msg = sprintf( "Paul o Polvo escolhe --> %s <--",
$args[ rand @args ] );
}
}
$server->command( 'msg ' . $target . ' ' . $output_msg );
}
}
signal_add( "message public", "public_polvo" );
signal_add( "message own_public", "own_polvo" );

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# vim: ai ts=4 sts=4 et sw=4 ft=perl
# vim: autoindent tabstop=4 shiftwidth=4 expandtab softtabstop=4 filetype=perl
use strict;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
$VERSION = "1.0";
%IRSSI = (
authors => "Pedro de Oliveira",
contact => "falsovsky\@gmail.com",
name => "ragemeter",
description => "With this script you caALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD",
license => "BSD"
);
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
my %colors = (
'white' => 0,
'black' => 1,
'blue' => 2,
'green' => 3,
'light red' => 4,
'red' => 5,
'purple' => 6,
'orange' => 7,
'yellow' => 8,
'light green' => 9,
'cyan' => 10,
'light cyan' => 11,
'light blue' => 12,
'light purple' => 13,
'gray' => 14,
'light gray' => 15
);
my %themes = (
'default' => [
$colors{'light green'}, $colors{'yellow'},
$colors{'orange'}, $colors{'light red'}
],
'new' => [
$colors{'light green'}, $colors{'yellow'}, $colors{'orange'},
$colors{'light red'}, $colors{'red'}
]
);
sub ragemeter {
my ( $data, $server, $window ) = @_;
my $width = 30; # Default var width
my $level = int( rand(105) + 1 ); # percentage filled
my $who = $server->{nick};
my $message = "";
my $theme = $themes{'default'};
if ( $data =~ m/-who (\S+)/ ) { $who = $1; $data =~ s/-who \S+//g; }
if ( $data =~ m/-width (\d+)/ ) { $width = $1; $data =~ s/-width \d+//g; }
if ( $data =~ m/-level (\d+)/ ) { $level = $1; $data =~ s/-level \d+//g; }
if ( $data =~ m/-msg ([\S ]+)/ ) { $message = $1; }
if ( $message eq "" ) {
if ( $level <= 15 ) { $message = "CALM AND PEACEFUL"; }
elsif ( $level <= 25 ) { $message = "RELAXED"; }
elsif ( $level <= 50 ) { $message = "NOT SO ANGRY"; }
elsif ( $level <= 100 ) { $message = "ANGRY AT YOU"; }
elsif ( $level > 100 ) { $message = "OFF DA SCALE (buffar ovarrun)"; }
}
my $ncolors = scalar(@$theme);
my $colorwidth = int( $width / $ncolors );
my $msg = "rage-meter for \002$who\002\037:\037 \00314[";
for ( my $i = 0 ; $i < $width ; $i++ ) {
for ( my $x = 0 ; $x < $ncolors ; $x++ ) {
if ( $i == $colorwidth * $x ) {
$msg .= "\003" . @$theme[$x];
}
}
if ( int( ( $i / $width ) * 100 ) >= $level ) {
$msg .= "-";
}
else {
$msg .= "=";
}
}
$msg .= "\00314]";
if ( $level > 100 ) {
my $levelwidth = ( $level * $width ) / 100;
$msg .= "\003" . @$theme[-1];
for ( my $i = 0 ; $i < ( $levelwidth - $width ) ; $i++ ) {
$msg .= "=";
}
}
$msg .= " \002\037\0034" . $message;
if ($window) {
$window->command( "say " . $msg );
}
else {
Irssi::print($msg);
}
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'ragemeter', 'ragemeter' );
Irssi::command_set_options( 'ragemeter', '-who -width -level -msg' );

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use Irssi;
@verb = (
"spanking", "dancing with", "feeding", "mounting",
"fucking", "shaving", "starving", "doing",
"slapping", "pimping", "chewing on", "scrubbing",
"eating", "stuffing"
);
@mid = ( "that", "my", "your", "the", "this" );
@adj = (
"funky", "fucking", "lethal", "hungry", "steaming", "fluffy",
"ripe", "swollen", "abused", "oozing", "dead", "rubber"
);
@noun = (
"chicken", "donkey", "bitch", "lumberjack", "mound", "headache",
"twat", "hemorrhoid", "goat", "dog", "cat", "god",
"wife", "bald head", "dude", "foot", "beaver"
);
sub randommsg {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$data =
$verb[ int( rand( $#verb + 1 ) ) ] . " "
. $mid[ int( rand( $#mid + 1 ) ) ] . " "
. $adj[ int( rand( $#adj + 1 ) ) ] . " "
. $noun[ int( rand( $#noun + 1 ) ) ];
$witem->command("/me is $data");
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'rand', 'randommsg' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub reverse {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command( "/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . scalar reverse($data) );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'r', 'reverse' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
use strict;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
$VERSION = "0.0.1";
%IRSSI = (
authors => 'Tiago Sousa (aka mirage) & falso',
contact => 'mirage\@kaotik.org',
name => 'slogan',
description => 'Prints slogans for the given keyword',
license => 'GPLv3',
url => 'http://',
);
my @slogans = (
"%string% - a class of it's own",
"%string% - a safe place in an unsafe world!",
"%string% - as good as it gets!",
"%string% - be prepared.",
"%string% - be ready.",
"%string% - empowering people.",
"%string% - enjoy the difference.",
"%string% - first class!",
"%string% - forget the rest.",
"%string% - get ready.",
"%string% - go for it!",
"%string% - go for the game.",
"%string% - If you love %string%.",
"%string% - it's like heaven!",
"%string% - Just do it.",
"%string% - living innovation",
"%string% - now!",
"%string% - once you have it, you love it.",
"%string% - One name. One legend.",
"%string% - play it!",
"%string% - simplified!",
"%string% - spice up your life.",
"%string% - The Revolution.",
"%string% - Think different.",
"%string% - to feel free!",
"%string% - today and tomorrow.",
"%string% - what more could you want?",
"%string% - Xtending service.",
"%string% - Yabba Dabba Duh!",
"%string% - You see this name, you think dirty.",
"%string% - your game.",
"%string% - Your personal entertainer.",
"%string% after a long day.",
"%string% beat.",
"%string% brings out the best.",
"%string% can do.",
"%string% Dreamteam.",
"%string% empowers you.",
"%string% evolution.",
"%string% extra dry.",
"%string% for a better future.",
"%string% for a professional image.",
"%string% for everybody.",
"%string% for everyone.",
"%string% for me!",
"%string% for president.",
"%string% for the masses.",
"%string% for you!",
"%string% for your health.",
"%string% for your kids!",
"%string% for your life.",
"%string% forever.",
"%string% groove.",
"%string% innovate your world.",
"%string% inside you.",
"%string% is a female force.",
"%string% is a never ending story.",
"%string% is back.",
"%string% is better than chocolate.",
"%string% is forever.",
"%string% is good for you.",
"%string% is inspiration.",
"%string% is my passion.",
"%string% is my sport.",
"%string% is my world.",
"%string% is our middle name.",
"%string% is rolling, the others are stoned.",
"%string% is the best!",
"%string% is the only way to be happy.",
"%string% is the sound of the future.",
"%string% is what the world was waiting for.",
"%string% is your friend.",
"%string% is your safe place in an unsafe world!",
"%string% it's a kind of magic.",
"%string% keeps going, and going, and going...",
"%string% kicks ass.",
"%string% know-how.",
"%string% lifestyle",
"%string% loves you.",
"%string% makes dreams come true.",
"%string% makes me hot.",
"%string% makes your day.",
"%string% moments.",
"%string% never die.",
"%string% never lies.",
"%string% never sleeps.",
"%string% nonstop.",
"%string% on the outside, tasty on the inside.",
"%string% online.",
"%string% only.",
"%string% rocks.",
"%string% rules.",
"%string% strikes back.",
"%string% takes good care of you.",
"%string% values.",
"%string% wanted.",
"%string% will be for you what you want it to be.",
"%string% will do anything for you.",
"%string% wonder.",
"%string%'s got it all!",
"%string%'s like heaven.",
"%string%, better than sex.",
"%string%, created by nature.",
"%string%, good.",
"%string%, i want it all.",
"%string%, in touch with tomorrow.",
"%string%, it's as simple as that!",
"%string%, just the best.",
"%string%, love it or leave it.",
"%string%, one for all.",
"%string%, pure lust.",
"%string%, since 1845.",
"%string%, so what!",
"%string%, stay in touch.",
"%string%, the clever way.",
"%string%, the freshmaker.",
"%string%, the original.",
"%string%, the real thing.",
"%string%, the secret of women.",
"%string%, the smart choice.",
"%string%, there's no better way.",
"%string%, this is it!",
"%string%, to hell with the rest.",
"%string%, where success is at home.",
"%string%, whiter than the whitest!",
"%string%, you'll love it!",
"%string%, you've got it!",
"%string%, your family will love you.",
"%string%, your specialist.",
"%string%, your way!",
"%string%. Impossible is nothing.",
"%string%. Making people sucessful in a changing world.",
"%string%. See more. Do more.",
"%string%. The power on your side.",
"%string%. We build smiles.",
"%string%... whatever you want.",
"%string%? Yes please.",
"%string%? You bet.",
"%string%rific.",
"%string%tastic!",
"3... 2... 1... %string%.",
"A day with %string%.",
"All you need is %string%.",
"Always the real thing, always %string%.",
"And on the eighth day, god created %string%.",
"Anyone can handle %string%.",
"Are you ready for %string%?",
"Be alive with %string%.",
"Be inspired by %string%.",
"Be part of %string%.",
"Be young, have fun, taste %string%.",
"Bigger. Better. %string%.",
"Break through with %string%.",
"Buy %string% now!",
"Call a friend, call %string%.",
"Can you feel %string%?",
"Can you feel it? %string%.",
"Connect with %string%.",
"Discover the world of %string%.",
"Do it with %string%.",
"Do you know %string%?",
"Don't forget your %string%.",
"Don't get in the way of %string%.",
"Don't mess with %string%.",
"Don't play with fire, play with %string%.",
"Don't worry, %string% takes care.",
"Easy %string%.",
"Endless possibilities with %string%.",
"Enjoy %string%.",
"Every %string% has a story.",
"Everyone loves %string%.",
"Everyone should believe in %string%.",
"Everything is simple with %string%.",
"Feel good with %string%.",
"Feel it - %string%!",
"Feel the magic of %string%.",
"Firstclass %string%!",
"Follow your %string%.",
"Food or %string%? I'll have %string%.",
"For the love of %string%.",
"Free %string%.",
"Funky %string%.",
"Get me my %string%.",
"Go far with %string%.",
"Go farther with %string%.",
"Go to heaven with %string%.",
"God made %string%.",
"Good to know %string%.",
"Halleluja, it's a %string%.",
"Have a break, have a %string%.",
"Heal the world with %string%.",
"hhmmmmm... %string%.",
"High life with %string%.",
"I believe in %string%.",
"I can't believe it's %string%.",
"I fall for %string%.",
"I lost weight with %string%.",
"I love %string%.",
"I quit smoking with %string%.",
"I trust %string%.",
"I want %string% and I want it now.",
"I want more, I want %string%.",
"I wish i had a %string%.",
"I wish i was a %string%.",
"I wouldn't leave the house without %string%.",
"I'd do anything for %string%.",
"I'd sleep with %string%.",
"I'd walk a mile for %string%.",
"Inspired by %string%.",
"It must be %string%.",
"It's my %string%!",
"It's not a dream. %string% is real!",
"It's time to think about %string%.",
"It's your %string%!",
"Jesus loves %string%.",
"Just %string%.",
"Keep going well, keep going %string%.",
"Kick ass with %string%!",
"Let your %string% flow.",
"Let's %string%!",
"Let's talk about %string%.",
"Life's beautiful with %string%.",
"Live %string%.",
"Long life %string%.",
"Lucky %string%.",
"Made by %string%.",
"Make the world a better place with %string%.",
"Make yourself at home with %string%.",
"My %string% and me.",
"My %string% beats everything.",
"My %string% is mine.",
"My %string%, your %string%, %string% for all!",
"My way is %string%.",
"Naughty little %string%.",
"Next stop, %string%.",
"No %string%, no kiss.",
"No need to worry with %string%.",
"Nobody does it like %string%.",
"Nobody doesn't like %string%.",
"Nonstop %string%.",
"Nothing is faster than %string%.",
"Nothing to worry about with %string%.",
"Oh my goddess, it's a %string%.",
"Oh my gods, it's a %string%.",
"Once %string%, always %string%.",
"One goal, one passion - %string%.",
"Ooh la la, %string%.",
"Passion for %string%.",
"Play %string%, start living.",
"Praise %string%.",
"Pure %string%. Pure Power.",
"Saved by %string%!",
"Say %string%.",
"Say it with %string%.",
"See the world with %string%.",
"See you at %string%.",
"Share moments, share %string%.",
"Simply %string%!",
"Start the day with %string%.",
"Stay cool with %string%.",
"Step into the light with %string%.",
"Swing your %string%.",
"Take what you want, but leave %string% alone!",
"Thanks %string%.",
"The %string% community.",
"The %string% effect.",
"The %string% look.",
"The %string% man.",
"The %string% people.",
"The %string% spirit.",
"The %string% universe.",
"The %string% way of life.",
"The age of %string%.",
"The American Way of %string%.",
"The art of %string%.",
"The best %string% in the world.",
"The Future of %string%.",
"The goddess made %string%.",
"The gods made %string%.",
"The ideal %string%.",
"The magic of %string%.",
"The one and only %string%.",
"The original %string%.",
"The Power of %string%.",
"The president buys %string%.",
"The queen buys %string%.",
"The Queen of %string%.",
"The secret of %string%.",
"The Spirit of %string%.",
"The view on %string%.",
"The wonder has a name: %string%.",
"There is no life without %string%.",
"There's a bit of %string% in all of us.",
"There's lots of fun in %string%.",
"There's only one thing in the world I want and that is %string%.",
"There's only one true %string%!",
"Things go better with %string%.",
"Think %string%.",
"Think different, think %string%.",
"Think. Feel. %string%.",
"Truly %string%.",
"Up, up and away with %string%.",
"Way to go, %string%!",
"What is %string%?",
"When you say %string% you've said it all.",
"Where the hell is %string%?",
"Where's %string%?",
"Where's your %string%?",
"Who is %string%?",
"Who wouldn't fight for %string%?",
"With a name like %string%, it has to be good.",
"World's finest %string%.",
"Worldclass %string%!",
"You better get inside %string%.",
"You better get your %string% out.",
"You can't beat %string%.",
"You can't stop %string%.",
"You don't want %string% as your enemy!",
"You know when it's %string%.",
"You wouldn't want to miss %string%."
);
# USAGE:
# /slogan <text>
# writes a slogan with "text" to the current channel
sub cmd_slogan {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
if ( !$server || !$server->{connected} ) {
Irssi::print("Not connected to server");
return;
}
if ( !$witem ) {
Irssi::print("Use this command in a channel or pvt");
return;
}
if ($data) {
my $slogan = $slogans[ rand @slogans ];
$slogan =~ s/%string%/$data/;
$witem->command( "/SAY " . $slogan );
}
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'slogan', 'cmd_slogan' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub taveira {
my $c = ("\003");
my @taveira = (
"${c}2\"Ui ca bom!\" ${c}6Taveira.1:69",
"${c}5\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Ui que enrabadela pa', que eu vou dar nesta querida.\" ${c}6Taveira.2:69",
"${c}10\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Ai, ele todo lah dentro!\" ${c}6Taveira.3:69",
"${c}3\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Todo la' dentro do cu da querida!\" ${c}6Taveira.4:69",
"${c}7\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Pronto querida! Estah todo, linda! Pronto! Pronto!\" ${c}6Taveira.5:69",
"${c}4\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Com kygel nao doi!\" ${c}6Taveira.6:69",
"${c}3\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Todo la' dentro do cu da querida!\" ${c}6Taveira.4:69",
"${c}5\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Esta's a ver querida como eh bom?\" ${c}6Taveira.7:69",
"${c}15\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Agora nao doi pois nao?Isso, poe esse cuzinho bem para cima.Va', aguenta-te bem. So' este bocadinho e' que doi.\" ${c}6Taveira.8:69",
"${c}7\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Isso mesmo, respira fundo! Pronto, ja' esta'. Pronto! Pronto! Na~o te va's embora.Aguenta, aguenta!\" ${c}6Taveira.9:69",
"${c}10\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Pronto, ja' esta'! Ja' esta' todo. Ui e' ta~o bom, esse cu!\" ${c}6Taveira.10:69",
"${c}9\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Enquanto me deixares meter o caralho no cu, fico sempre a gostar de ti.\" ${c}6Taveira.11:69",
"${c}10\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Vou ali buscar oleo.\" ${c}6Taveira.12:69",
"${c}14\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Aguenta, aguenta!\" ${c}6Taveira.13:69",
"${c}10\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Vai aguentando que depois venho-me na tua boca. Depois deitas tudo na minha barriguinha e lambes, ta' bem?\" ${c}6Taveira.14:69",
"${c}11\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Vamos comer a Fatinha, na~o e'?\" ${c}6Taveira.15:69",
"${c}2\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Olha o que vai entrar nesse CU!Vah, que esta cabecinha nao tem ombros!\" ${c}6Taveira.16:69",
"${c}3\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Queres oleo?E' grande demais?Ah, que vou faze-la sofrer um bocadinho.\" ${c}6Taveira.17:69",
"${c}12\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Ah diz assim, Eh bruto!, diz alto diz.Aguenta! Nao chora!\" ${c}6Taveira.18:69",
"${c}2\"TAVEIRA DISSE : Eh grande nao eh?\" ${c}6Taveira.19:69"
);
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command(
"/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . $taveira[ rand @taveira ] );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'taveira', 'taveira' );

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use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub trolha {
my $c = ("\003");
my @trolha = (
"${c}2trolha DIXIT \"A tua mãe só pode ser uma ostra para cuspir uma pérola como tu!\" ${c}6trolha.1:69",
"${c}5\"trolha DIXIT : Só queria que fosses uma pastilha elástica para te comer o dia todo.\" ${c}6trolha.2:69",
"${c}10\"trolha DIXIT : Tens um cú que parece uma cebola! É de comer e chorar por mais!\" ${c}6trolha.3:69",
"${c}3\"trolha DIXIT : Oh boa, com um cú desses deves cagar bombons!!\" ${c}6trolha.4:69",
"${c}7\"trolha DIXIT : És como um helicóptero: gira e boa!\" ${c}6trolha.5:69",
"${c}4\"trolha DIXIT : Um dia pensei Levar-te no meu coração Mas depois topei Que era muita areia para o meu camião...\" ${c}6trolha.6:69",
"${c}5\"trolha DIXIT : Usas cuecas TMN? É que tens um rabinho que é um mimo! \" ${c}6trolha.7:69",
"${c}15\"trolha DIXIT : Belas pernas! A que horas abrem?\" ${c}6trolha.8:69",
"${c}7\"trolha DIXIT : Ó Fevera! Junta-te aqui à brasa!\" ${c}6trolha.9:69",
"${c}10\"trolha DIXIT : Ó joia! Anda aqui ao ourives.\" ${c}6trolha.10:69",
"${c}9\"trolha DIXIT : Ó morcôna, comia-te o sufixo!\" ${c}6trolha.11:69",
"${c}10\"trolha DIXIT : Ó linda, sobe-me à palmeira e lambe-me os cocos...\" ${c}6trolha.12:69",
"${c}14\"trolha DIXIT : Sabes onde ficava bem essa tua roupa? Toda amarrotada no chão do meu quarto!\" ${c}6trolha.13:69",
"${c}10\"trolha DIXIT : Contigo filha, era até ao osso!\" ${c}6trolha.14:69",
"${c}11\"trolha DIXIT : Ó estrela, Queres cometa?\" ${c}6trolha.15:69",
"${c}7\"trolha DIXIT : Ó pessega..tirava-te o pelo todo...nem caroço deixava!\" ${c}6trolha.16:69",
"${c}12\"trolha DIXIT : fazes anos ? vou-te partir o bolo todo!\" ${c}8trolha.17:69",
);
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$witem->command( "/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " " . $trolha[ rand @trolha ] );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'trolha', 'trolha' );

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##################################################
# tROUT speaking for irssi
##################################################
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
sub tROUT {
my ( $data, $server, $witem ) = @_;
$data =~ s/( ?)(\w)(\w*)/$1\l$2\U$3/g;
$witem->command( "/MSG " . $witem->{name} . " $data" );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'trout', 'tROUT' );
Irssi::print("tROUTNESS sCRIPT lOADED\n uSE wITH /tROUT text");

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#!/usr/bin/perl
#// Based on CoolNerds' Random Profound Insight Generator
#// @ http://www.coolnerds.com/webauth/jscript/profound.htm
#// Unholy lexicon and all invoked titles (c) Rob Waldie, June 98
#// --
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
@first = (
"And", "Of", "Under", "In",
"Through", "Between", "Beneath", "Beyond",
"Towards", "Into", "From", "Conquering",
"Praise", "Praising", "Storming", "Hailing",
"Beholding", "Worshipping", "Bleeding For", "Dwelling In",
"Rising From", "Descending Into", "War For", "Battling For",
"Gazing Over", "Hearing", "Blaspheming", "Crossing",
"Invoking", "Traversing", "Forever Reigns", "Conquer",
"Storm", "Hail", "Behold", "Invoke",
"Over"
);
@article = ( "a", "The" );
@adjective = (
"Black", "Hateful", "Evil", "Melancholic",
"Satanic", "Eternal", "Frostbitten", "Freezing",
"Funeral", "Blood Red", "Nocturnal", "Winter",
"Satanic", "Unholy", "Grim", "Frozen",
"Spectral", "Dead", "Grey", "Bleakest",
"Burning", "Silent", "Still", "Dark",
"Pagan", "Vast", "Mighty", "Infernal",
"Majestic", "Blasphemic", "Heathen", "Everlasting",
"Ancient", "Northern", "Antichristian", "Blazing",
"Crucified"
);
@noun1 = (
"Wood", "Forest", "Mountain", "Night",
"Realm", "Kingdom", "Dominion", "Northland",
"North", "Hell", "Underworld", "Infinity",
"Eternity", "Chasm", "Sky", "Blood",
"Wrath", "Power", "Might", "Glory",
"Forevermore", "Despair", "Shadows", "Throne",
"Fullmoon", "Cosmos", "Death", "Darkness",
"Frost", "Horizon", "Fog", "Mist",
"Hordes", "Legion", "Passage", "Blasphemy",
"Fall Of Heaven", "Death Of Christ", "Twilight", "Furnace",
"Chalice", "Sword", "Dagger", "Coffin",
"Pentagram", "Cloak", "Chant", "Scream",
"Cry", "Wolf", "Raven", "Winter",
"Demon", "Storm", "Whore", "Goat",
"Dawn", "Crucifixion", "Oath", "Pact"
);
@preposition = (
"Beyond", "Towards", "Into", "From",
"And", "Of", "Under", "In",
"Through", "Between", "Beneath", "With",
"Surrounded By", "Bewitched By", "For The Glory Of", "Over",
"In The Name Of"
);
@noun2 = (
"Woods", "Forests", "Mountains", "Night",
"Realms", "Kingdoms", "Dominions", "Northlands",
"North", "Hell", "Underworlds", "Infinity",
"Eternity", "Chasms", "Skies", "Wolves",
"Wrath", "Power", "Might", "Glory",
"Forevermore", "Despair", "Shadows", "Thrones",
"Necromancy", "Cosmos", "Death", "Darkness",
"Frosts", "Horizons", "Fog", "Mist",
"Hordes", "Legions", "Passages", "Blasphemy",
"Lust", "Sin", "Twilight", "Sodomy",
"Chalices", "Swords", "Daggers", "Coffins",
"Pentagrams", "Flagellation", "Chants", "Screams",
"Cries", "Winter", "Demons", "Witchery",
"Spellcraft", "Hellfire", "Supremecy", "Desolation",
"Light", "Storms", "Winds", "Horns",
"Damnation", "Evil", "Immortality", "Inferno",
"Spears"
);
use vars qw (@first, @article, @adjective, @noun1, @preposition, @noun2);
#//function to generate the random profundity.
sub unholybmizer {
$msg = $first[ int( rand(@first) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $article[ int( rand(@article) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $adjective[ int( rand(@adjective) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $noun1[ int( rand(@noun1) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $preposition[ int( rand(@preposition) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $adjective[ int( rand(@adjective) ) ] . " ";
$msg .= $noun2[ int( rand(@noun2) ) ];
Irssi::active_win()->command( '/say ' . $msg );
}
Irssi::command_bind( 'unholybmizer', 'unholybmizer' );

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use strict;
use utf8;
use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
use Irssi;
use Irssi::Irc;
$VERSION = "0.2";
%IRSSI = (
authors => "Pedro de Oliveira",
contact => "falso\@rdk.homeip.net",
name => "Zalgo - HE COMES",
description =>
"Zalgo-ing script based on tchouky\'s javascript Zalgo text generator - http://www.eeemo.net/",
license => "BSD"
);
my @zalgo_up = (
"\x{030d}", "\x{030e}", "\x{0304}", "\x{0305}", "\x{033f}", "\x{0311}",
"\x{0306}", "\x{0310}", "\x{0352}", "\x{0357}", "\x{0351}", "\x{0307}",
"\x{0308}", "\x{030a}", "\x{0342}", "\x{0343}", "\x{0344}", "\x{034a}",
"\x{034b}", "\x{034c}", "\x{0303}", "\x{0302}", "\x{030c}", "\x{0350}",
"\x{0300}", "\x{0301}", "\x{030b}", "\x{030f}", "\x{0312}", "\x{0313}",
"\x{0314}", "\x{033d}", "\x{0309}", "\x{0363}", "\x{0364}", "\x{0365}",
"\x{0366}", "\x{0367}", "\x{0368}", "\x{0369}", "\x{036a}", "\x{036b}",
"\x{036c}", "\x{036d}", "\x{036e}", "\x{036f}", "\x{033e}", "\x{035b}",
"\x{0346}", "\x{031a}"
);
my @zalgo_down = (
"\x{0316}", "\x{0317}", "\x{0318}", "\x{0319}", "\x{031c}", "\x{031d}",
"\x{031e}", "\x{031f}", "\x{0320}", "\x{0324}", "\x{0325}", "\x{0326}",
"\x{0329}", "\x{032a}", "\x{032b}", "\x{032c}", "\x{032d}", "\x{032e}",
"\x{032f}", "\x{0330}", "\x{0331}", "\x{0332}", "\x{0333}", "\x{0339}",
"\x{033a}", "\x{033b}", "\x{033c}", "\x{0345}", "\x{0347}", "\x{0348}",
"\x{0349}", "\x{034d}", "\x{034e}", "\x{0353}", "\x{0354}", "\x{0355}",
"\x{0356}", "\x{0359}", "\x{035a}", "\x{0323}"
);
my @zalgo_mid = (
"\x{0315}", "\x{031b}", "\x{0340}", "\x{0341}", "\x{0358}", "\x{0321}",
"\x{0322}", "\x{0327}", "\x{0328}", "\x{0334}", "\x{0335}", "\x{0336}",
"\x{034f}", "\x{035c}", "\x{035d}", "\x{035e}", "\x{035f}", "\x{0360}",
"\x{0362}", "\x{0338}", "\x{0337}", "\x{0361}", "\x{0489}"
);
sub irand {
return int( rand( $_[0] ) );
}
sub rand_zalgo {
return $_[ irand( scalar(@_) ) ];
}
sub is_zalgo_char {
my $i;
for ( $i = 0 ; $i <= scalar(@zalgo_up) ; $i++ ) {
if ( $_[0] eq $zalgo_up[$i] ) {
return 1;
}
}
for ( $i = 0 ; $i <= scalar(@zalgo_down) ; $i++ ) {
if ( $_[0] eq $zalgo_down[$i] ) {
return 1;
}
}
for ( $i = 0 ; $i <= scalar(@zalgo_mid) ; $i++ ) {
if ( $_[0] eq $zalgo_mid[$i] ) {
return 1;
}
}
return 0;
}
sub he_comes {
my $txt = $_[0];
my $newtxt = '';
for ( my $i = 0 ; $i <= length($txt) ; $i++ ) {
if ( is_zalgo_char( substr( $txt, $i, 1 ) ) == 1 ) {
next;
}
my $num_up;
my $num_mid;
my $num_down;
$newtxt .= substr( $txt, $i, 1 );
# mini
if ( $_[1] == 1 ) {
$num_up = irand(8);
$num_mid = irand(2);
$num_down = irand(8);
}
# normal
if ( $_[1] == 2 ) {
$num_up = irand(16) / 2 + 1;
$num_mid = irand(6) / 2;
$num_down = irand(16) / 2 + 1;
}
# maxi
if ( $_[2] == 3 ) {
$num_up = irand(64) / 4 + 3;
$num_mid = irand(16) / 4 + 1;
$num_down = irand(64) / 4 + 3;
}
my $j;
# up
for ( $j = 0 ; $j <= $num_up ; $j++ ) {
$newtxt .= rand_zalgo(@zalgo_up);
}
# mid
for ( $j = 0 ; $j <= $num_mid ; $j++ ) {
$newtxt .= rand_zalgo(@zalgo_mid);
}
# down
for ( $j = 0 ; $j <= $num_down ; $j++ ) {
$newtxt .= rand_zalgo(@zalgo_down);
}
}
return $newtxt;
}
sub irssi_zalgoamento {
my ( $s, $server, $witem ) = @_;
my $level = Irssi::settings_get_int('zalgo_level');
if ( $level < 1 or $level > 3 ) {
$level = 1;
}
$witem->command( "msg " . $witem->{name} . " " . he_comes( $s, $level ) );
}
Irssi::settings_add_int( 'misc', 'zalgo_level', 1 );
Irssi::command_bind( 'zalgo', 'irssi_zalgoamento' );
Irssi::print( "Zalgo!!!! HE COMES!!\n/set zalgo_level [1-3]\n"
. "1 para pouco zalgamento, 3 para muito" );